Whilst I was winding up T of Chatham, I was also fielding lots of other interest. Amazing how adept one becomes at spotting a phony after a while. C of Mansion House (don’t these scammers research the areas of London they purport to come from?) had looked very attractive for all of ½ a day and two messages!
However, there were also nice people about. B of Dartford seems very sweet although maybe not very exciting. We still haven’t met but I think we will. Whether we are a match, time will tell. A of Canterbury is different story. He is a biker and from his photos looked a little unkempt. However, he is very honest in his (various) profiles about what he is and isn’t looking for. This is good for managing expectations, he said openly that he wasn’t looking for a wife or live-in lover but a live-out lover would be nice! We had been winking and sending odd messages back and forth since the start of joining site 1 and here he is on site 3. Because he does not live huge distances from me I had suggested a meet up early on, thinking whilst we might not be a match it would be good practice for me to have a date, this was before I had met P of Croydon. At that point, although he was happy to meet, we couldn’t find a mutually convenient day/time and the moment passed. He had told me honestly that he was actively seeing 3 or 4 other ladies so I wasn’t surprised. Just before Christmas we decided to give it another go and met in a convenient pub for a drink. When he arrived, I was pleasantly surprised how smart he looked. We chatted for an hour or so, what a difference from my first date when we were searching for conversation topics. This time we talked easily and I had a really nice time and felt comfortable. He had joked before we met that he’d bring mistletoe and I mentioned it in the pub. He said we’d have a little kiss when we left. I was expecting a fairly chaste kiss in the car park. He invited me in the back of his car for 10 minutes and I thought ‘why not? 10 minutes, busy car park, I can do this.’ Well about 20 minutes later he escorted me back to my car in a gentlemanly manner whilst I straightened my clothing and pushed my hair back to some semblance of order. Wow, I hadn’t been kissed like that for a very long time!
Looking back on it now, some 4 weeks later (gosh only 4 weeks?) I think that was a big turning point for me. I started walking round with a silly grin on my face, a gleam in my eye and a spring in my step. Lots of people noticed it but didn’t necessarily know why. I started buying more sexy clothes not just to wear on dates but wearing them even to go to the supermarket. What was the matter with me? I’ve been this ‘pillar of the community’ for years and to friends and colleagues, although I hope most would have described me as kind, loyal, trustworthy, fun even, I think very few had seen the naughty side of me which was re-emerging. I hadn’t felt as good as this for about 30 years!
Christmas and New Year came and went and I felt ready to swim in a bigger pool. I joined my first international dating site (4). This was a whole new ball game really. I got swamped with so many messages from Americans in particular but other nationalities too that I had to write a standard polite response saying I was hoping to date someone in person close to home and make it a copy and paste job. At least they got a reply. At this time, I also had a couple of photographs taken just to use on dating websites and removed all others I had posted. It occurred to me that as my daughter had been able to discover some scammers by searching for their images on the internet, someone could do the same to me. Whilst I had no dishonest intent, with the information I had posted, unwisely, about my life and with the photos, it wouldn’t take a Sherlock with a bit of internet savvy to track down exactly who I am and where I live which was a bit disturbing.